“So much so, ‘I love you’ has come to acquire a particular connotation in my mind – smaller, a little hidden, and living alongside its bigger, sweeter and more comforting sense. Hearing those words brings up the possibility of their negation, of growing out of a world of all-encompassing love. It is as though a fish is being reassured that there is plenty of water in the ocean, not to worry, and so is needlessly reminded that there is indeed a world out there made of air, one in which it would suffocate.”
In Abbas El-Zein’s new memoir, conflicts abound – either tragic or amusing, sometimes both – between teachers and students, left- and right-wing factions, civilians and militiamen and, not least, French and Arabic, two languages vying for primacy in the post-colonial worlds of Beirut and the Levant, with English coming fast from behind.
By the time he graduated from high school, El-Zein had nearly drowned in the Mediterranean, survived the breakout of civil war and lived through the violent death of two close family members. He witnessed Syrian and Israeli soldiers invade his country and, from his bedroom balcony, saw the mushroom cloud of the explosion that killed hundreds of American and French marines. But while war and tragedy struck every now and then, everyday life continued unabated, rich with humour, serendipity and love of many kinds.
Bullet, Paper, Rock is a story of survival, and a meditation on desire and loss, language and violence. It is at once a requiem for a Levantine past gone sour – from the innocent 1970s, through September 11 and its aftermath, to the cataclysms of the Arab Spring and the Israel-Palestine conflict – and a tribute to women of his family – “weavers whose fabric of choice is hope, they were hard at work, at night as in daytime, carving out viable lives, ones in which they loved and were loved aplenty.”
Praise for Bullet, Paper, Rock
“Bullet, Paper, Rock is a kind of wonder-room of glimpses of childhood and youth in Lebanon, of family entanglements, migration, war and above all language, the trilingual man’s love affair with language. The writer’s English is startling in its serenity and precision against a seething background of loss and calamity, at once personal and universal. Abbas El-Zein speaks about the things that matter most to everyone. His voice is not one you will easily forget.”- Robert Dessaix
“His is a rare voice – gentle, warm and humorous yet precise in its forensic eye for the details that resonate.” – Judges of the Queensland Non-Fiction Literary Award, 2024
“…by turns devastating, witty and deeply moving…El-Zein’s writing is a dazzling combination of precision and playfulness. Bullet, Paper, Rock is a work that shimmers, shapeshifts and beckons the reader to follow.” – Judges of the Douglas-Steward Prize for Non-Fiction, NSW Literary Awards, 2025.
“Abbas El-Zein’s memoir is a work of rare linguistic and emotional insight, and a tribute to the resilience of the human condition. Through a series of meticulously crafted vignettes, El-Zein charts a remarkable life shaped by war, loss, migration and love. What distinguishes this autobiography is the way that the author combines serious themes and a wide geographical scope with a voice that is intimate and often playful. Major historical moments are woven with pop cultural references and familial idiosyncrasies, minimising the distance between reader and writer.” – Judges of the National Book Award, 2025.
